Gratitude

This morning I have been pondering all the things in my life I'm grateful for. It's amazing how abundant life becomes when you can spot those things of importance. The most significance is relationships. I'm not sure why I was so hesitant to connect with others, including my own husband and children. What a great journey I have been on and so blessed to have this time to learn more about how amazing my family and friends are. My gratitude is indescribable!!

Our children think it's a bit strange at times because that is not what they grew up with. I figured I was doing them a favor not connecting with them, thinking they would be disappointed in my short comings AND me a favor because then I wouldn't get hurt. Silly thoughts but they were very real.

In Napoleon Hill's book "Think and Grow Rich", one of his 6 fears... fear of loss of love. I would never have believed this was a strong driving force behind why I did what I did. The other big fear was .... fear of criticism. This one made sense, I grew up where I could do nothing right, according to everyone in my life such as; Teachers, Mother, Sister, Friends, Neighbors etc. I mean no one!!! I either talked to much or too little, did too much or to little, expected to do great in school but didn't, even my 7th grade choir teacher asked me in front of the class, "what in heaven's name are even doing in this class? You can't sing!" She suggested I not come back. Yes that is a true story.

It got so it became true for me as well. I self judged myself as never being good enough. When I married and started our family, this made more sense as to why I stayed back from connecting to those that matter most in my life. Those fears felt real and strong. HOWEVER, when I learned and understood more about what fears are and where they come from, I began to walk through the darkness as I started my new journey towards love and acceptance. First person being myself! I knew if I couldn't accept and love myself -- I knew I could not give what I didn't have!

This holiday season, give yourself the ultimate gift.... the gift of acceptance and love of who you are ... the good, bad and ugly!

Create yourself a fabulous day!

Jody